Finding Clarity Daily – How to feel good about your next steps

Clarity doesn’t just come and stay, it’s something we have to keep getting. If we’re clear about things, generally we feel happy right? We’re confident about how things are going according to what we want. It gives us a sense of peace and contentment that we’re on the right path. That everything is going to be OK.

But I think the assumption is that clarity should come and stay like a shining beacon guiding our way. That we will consistently feel good about our life and have a strong direction. We think we should know what we’re here for, what our purpose is, what life is all about. We want to know that we are safe and secure and that our family is provided for. We want to wake up and bounce out of bed like a 5 year old with not a care in the world, full of energy and vitality and pumped about the day ahead. That means we know exactly how the day will go, we’ve got it fully planned and we feel super confident and ready to enjoy and get on with our life full of confidence and vigour!

I guess you might have worked out that our days are not always like that. I know mine aren’t. Even though I’m following own path, making my own choices and living the way I want to, some days they are still fuzzy or a bit fearful. Some days we struggle to get out of bed at all.

The key is to re-commit and the way to do that is regain clarity.

Clarity to me is many things and takes many forms:
* It’s gaining a new perspective on life and how we’re living it.
* It’s appreciating where we are at right now, what we have and seeing things how they really are.
* It’s stopping and seeing, feeling and hearing – it’s using all our senses to enjoy life as best we can.
* Sometimes we have to stop focusing on where we’re going and just be with where we’re at – and that’s clarity too.
Clarity is not just seeing things as they are but also tuning in or changing how you feel about how they are.

It’s not just about being able to look forward and KNOW where we’re going, because sometimes we don’t. In fact we never truly know where we’re going, we only ever FEEL a certain way about where we think we’re going.

We mostly like to feel comfortable, or confident or calm about where we’re going. The good news we can always do that if we take the time to find our way again. We might not have control over exactly what happens and when, but we always have control about how we FEEL about it.

I like to regain my clarity daily by doing a few simple things to re-commit and re-tune in with where I’m at right now.

The whole of Path 1 is about self-awareness and finding fresh clarity in what you’re doing and how you’re being. They’re not things you do once and then say I’ve done it, what next. They are things that need to be woven into your life and enjoyed regularly. I have built these five activities into my lifestyle.

Sometimes I think we chastise ourselves unfairly for having to do the same things over and over again. But in truth, that’s how life is. We have to eat, move, breathe, exercise every day. So to have to include a few other rituals that bring us back into good and happy space is not unrealistic.

Try enjoying the five steps from my personal clarity path and build them into your routine.

1. Wake-up slow down. Take the time to reflect on your feelings
2. Create a morning ritual, that allows you to put the joy back into what you’re doing and re-commit
3. Find your still space. Don’t avoid being still and hearing what your thoughts are really telling you
4. Check in with your perfect day. Are you already living it?
5. Create, check in or re-create your vision board. Is it somewhere you can see it daily?

Living the dream? what does that really mean …

I had a conversation this week with someone I admire; she’s living in one of the most beautiful spots in the world, enjoying what seems to be the most amazing vocation – and enjoying the lifestyle and learning and growing with her craft. She said during the conversation – yep – ‘living the dream’. I’ve heard that said before a few times and it got me thinking.

I think it’s only now that I really understand what it means.

Living the dream used to conjure up days of inspiration and fulfilment, feeling constantly wired about life and having some kind of charmed existence that’s only reserved for the lucky ones.

Now I see that living the dream is not necessarily about everything falling into place and becoming an amazing, hassle free existence. But first of all, I must say that living the dream should be no less appealing and sought after, as it is still the best way to live.

  • For me, it’s following your heart when you feel scared.
  • It’s making decisions that others sometimes don’t understand with and having the faith and confidence to follow through.
  • It’s getting up and doing the same stuff – over and over again – including the stuff you’d rather not do.
  • It’s trying things that haven’t been done before rather than relying on how it’s been done before.
  • It’s remembering to be grateful for the days where you are struggling, along with the days you are floating on cloud nine – because you don’t get one without the other.
  • It’s enjoying every single minute as best you can, because you know you’ve chosen it and you’d rather be doing this than anything else – even with all its pitfalls.

Yes – living the dream is great, but it’s also challenging, bumpy and little bit scary sometimes. Unless your dream is to float along waiting for life to take you on its twists and turns. It’s worth following your dream, because it means you get to live your dream.

Why is it really the best way to live? Because living your dream is not about waiting for a dream to come true. It doesn’t mean you work hard knowing you’re going to get huge rewards or massive recognition. Living the dream means you’re doing what you’d do anyway. When you take everything else away, the huge financial wins, the viral posts and the massive lists. The big brand and the safe business. Whatever you seek, whatever you’re chasing, may not come about, but living the dreams means you’re happy seeking it, content in chipping steadily away at the next goal and steadily taking the next step, knowing you’re where you want to be, doing what you want to do – regardless of the outcome. THAT’S living the dream.

Not living the dream?

  • Is wondering what if.
  • Doubting and not doing.
  • Second guessing and procrastinating.
  • Fearing and failing before starting.
  • Giving up before you’ve even given it a go.
  • Living someone else’s life
  • Chasing someone else’s dreams
  • Following someone else’s path
  • Copying someone else’s vision.

No thank you…

How do you keep your hopes and dreams alive? Learn to believe.

It’s Christmas time and I’m sitting here in a coffee shop in my hometown in England, lapping up the atmosphere of Christmas Spirit they do so well over here. Well, ok it is a little over the top but I love it. They call it the silly season, but I still believe in the spirit of Christmas. Visiting your hometown is always going to be a little reminiscent especially at Christmas and it has got me thinking how as a little girl, I used to believe anything was possible. That I could do anything, be anything have anything. If I wanted something, I’d go get it. A job, a holiday, a new pair of jeans, a place at my chosen University – It was pretty simple and things kinda fell into place quite easily.

The thing is, life has a way of taking away that simple ability to choose and go get what you want. We overthink, over-plan, overwork and start doubting our decisions. Things don’t go according to plan and the wonder of life gets buried in chores, duties, and demands and our ability to believe gets watered down and possibly even washed away.

I still believe anything is possible, I’m certain that is the case, but I know now that not everything is likely. Some things that were a ‘dead certainty’ for me have turned into an ‘I doubt it now’. I’ve been dealt enough false starts to let the doubts and dreads creep in and to be honest, it’s been a bit of struggle to sometimes turn it around and keep believing in what is possible for my life. Life has chipped away at my youthful energy and replaced it with a mature kind of reality that I, and most people I know, learn to live with and accept. But I know that many people let these hurdles chip away so much that they give up on their dreams. Many even experience far worse with anxiety and fear taking over their lives on a daily basis.

Amongst all the wishing, wanting, desiring and planning, I have learned a far more valuable lesson that gives me more peace and happiness than any possessions or achievement could ever give me. Because right now, I have more purpose and meaning than I ever had, I have a deeper knowing around who I am and what I really want. I’ve found a calm, centered place that I can go to regain belief in myself, faith in my direction. A place I can go where I can believe in me again. In my choices. In my direction. And that’s pretty much everything to me.

I have the faith and belief that I can do things My Way and that will be OK. Over the years I’ve tried to fit in, stand out, do things differently, do things that I was uncomfortable with, do things I didn’t want to do but felt I should do. I’ve followed gurus and learned from ‘experts’. Now I’m learning to trust myself again and do things that I believe will work and that I believe in wholeheartedly. I’ve learned to believe in myself, in my choices.

Because after all, if we can’t believe in ourselves, who can we believe in?

There are many – MANY things we can’t 100% rely on happening. Stuff happens. Good and Bad. Things don’t always work out as planned, in fact, things rarely work out as planned. Life doesn’t stay steady any more than Santa is going to jump down our chimney. But without good, there’d be no bad, ups and downs are the natural order of things. What we can do is learn to manage how we handle events and how we bounce back and get on moving towards what we really want, without being attached to whether we get it! How we get back to believing in ourselves again – every day.

I’ve learned a few key tricks that bring me back on track, back to believing … Here’s one of my favorites, it’s a simple mantra I use if doubts creep in:


The biggest problem with making a dream happen, or following an unknown path, is looking too far ahead and looking for answers that you won’t find – yet, or looking at the skills and knowledge you don’t have – yet, or getting overwhelmed with what it’s going to take to get to where you want to go. So, instead of worrying about all that, I simply acknowledge that – maybe it’s possible. I don’t discount it and give up. I don’t worry and stress and work myself silly trying to make it happen. I just say – maybe. Then I start to look for ways forward that may be possible. I start to look for signs and ideas that could take me closer. And most of all I listen to how I want to do it, how I choose to get there, how I can make it happen rather than looking at all the ways other people have done it, or not done it. And all the while I try to stay detached from the outcome, because whether I do or whether I don’t, I have found something far more valuable, that’s having the belief that it’s possible.

Find a quiet space inside where we can go and whisper to ourselves, maybe – just maybe – I can find a way My Way.

So yes, there are a lot of things I still want. Some material, some experiences, but the thing that brings me the most peace, is the knowledge that I can now get back on track and believe in myself again, belief in my own path.

As it’s nearing the end of the year, it’s a great time to check in and recommit to your direction or to let go of what is not serving you perhaps. It’s a time of mixed feelings – relief that a break is around the corner and hope that next year will bring prosperity and happiness.

  1. What do you believe to be possible in your life?
  2. What are your dreams and desires?
  3. What have you given up on?
    Can you start with Maybe?

If you don’t know what the question is, you’ll never find the answer.

Asking questions is sometimes the best way to move forward. And asking them out loud is much better than letting them sit and fester in your mind. Just finding the question, acknowledging the question and putting the question out there is a huge step forward, because it allows you space to wait for the answer to come back. The trouble is we spend a lot of time avoiding questions because we fear what the answer might entail. It involves thinking and that is scary huh?

We avoid thinking sometimes because we’d prefer to have things left as they are rather than disturbing unhealed wounds. Crazy as it seems, we prefer to trundle on struggling and working day after day, knowing deep down that something is not working, rather than slowing down and listening to our hearts that can guide us towards our next step. So why is it difficult to ask questions sometimes? Look at a small child and they’re full of questions. The world is just one big question! What, why, where, when … One after the other they just fall out of their mouths. But as we become adults, we hold stuff back. We think about what we say, try to craft a ‘clever question’ or a ‘question that will bear most fruit’ or just keep out mouths shut because it’s easier and we don’t want to make waves or look silly. Oh yeah, I feel that one – looking silly – we don’t want to do that do we!!!

So why are we so bad at asking questions these days? Here’s a few thoughts on that:

When we ask a question, we are acknowledging to ourselves that we don’t have the answer and sometimes that can be troublesome to our egos.
There’s many just like to think they know best, they’ve done it before so there’s nothing to learn, or that they can’t learn from anyone else.
Many a great question has gone unspoken from fear of looking foolish, or thinking that it’s silly or they should really know the answer.
We take it granted what ‘experts’ say – they must know better so who am I to question their judgement.
Then of course, you don’t know how to ask a question if you don’t know there’s an answer to be got! It’s just too hard to craft a question around a subject you don’t understand! You don’t hae the words for it –
And asking questions means you don’t know everything, you don’t have your shit together so people won’t take you seriously in your field …

Of course you don’t even have to ask the question directly to another person. Just by listening and acknowledging your own questions and releasing them out into the world, you open up space for the answer to come to you. It’s amazing how many times I’ve sat and thought about something that I’m stuck on, crafted a question, put it out there in my mind and let it go. The answer comes when you least expect it, or the person with the answer appears just at the right time with the answer to your question – often without even having to ask it directly.

Oh there’s so many reasons why we keep our mouths shut I know.

Asking questions:

  • Frees the mind to allow new ideas in
  • Helps you acknowledge your current situation from a real perspective
  • Helps you let go of worrying and fretting over what to do next
  • Keeps you curious
  • Gives you answers!
  • Helps you grow
  • Helps others grow – you’re probably going to answer a question that’s on other people’s minds too!

Holding questions back:

  • Weighs down the mind and creates stuck energy
  • Makes you feel annoyed with yourself for not having the guts to ask them!
  • Keeps you blocked from moving forward
  • Keeps you thinking inwardly and gives you a tendency to become insular
  • Stops growth for you and others

I love solving problems so I love asking questions. I love learning. I love the challenge of something new and seeking answers from a new perspective. I love to be inquisitive and curious and look for a new way, a new path, a new idea. It’s the creative in me. Here’s some great questions you might like to ask yourself

1. What is ONE question that you can ask – of yourself – or someone else, that will give you the biggest momentum, or clarity right now to move towards your dreams and visions more confidently? It might be tangible, or it might be more abstract.

Ask me now! Join me at Big Vision Baby Steps on facebook and I’ll answer your questions if I can!

Following your true creative path in business

If you have a business, but you want MORE than just a business … You might be looking for an AdVenture!

I have a problem with the words ‘business’. I didn’t aspire to be a business person. I know people who are business people and they love ‘doing business’ – but for me and many others, the word ‘business’ doesn’t conjure up good vibes or inspire them to take the business path. I much prefer the ideas of having, or creating, and AdVenture. That’s a Venture with some Added fun, freedom and creativity!

The whole idea of being in business can be a bit scary, it can mean freedom – if you do it right. If you get it wrong it can be far from freedom giving.

Let’s look at a business from a different perspective to start with:

A business is “an organisational entity involved in the provision of goods and services to consumers”.

Here’s some other words you might like to explore in the context of business:

Pursuit • Activity • Life’s Work • Vocation • Walk of life • Enterprise • Purpose • Venture • Work

For me, it’s all about having my business work for me and having a business that delivers more and gives me more than money. I am happy to say that I now have a ‘FREEDOM-DRIVEN’ BUSINESS; one that offers you a lifestyle, purpose and allows you to pursue your passion.

This is MY definition of business as I like it …

A platform for self-expression, an outlet for creativity, a purposeful venture that delivers more than money. A venture that lights you up and brings you freedom, purpose, joy and personal fulfilment whilst delivering something of immense value to the world.

DO YOU HAVE A BUSINESS – but you want MORE than just a business …

  • Maybe you have a business but it’s not ticking the boxes
  • You’re still in a business doing something that doesn’t light you up any more
  • You see so much more potential for you business and you want to change it
  • Or maybe you don’t really want a business, you want an outlet for your creativity or a platform to share your ideas.
  • You just want to spend your days doing what you enjoy, what lights you up and make a GOOD living out of it not just get by
  • And you want to be able to express yourself fully and openly, helping people that appreciate you and value you

If I just wanted a business, I’d be where I was 15 years ago – running a what would anyone would consider to be a successful design and marketing agency. With a staff of 15 and an enviable client base, it was by anyone’s standards – a good business. A successful business in the heart of a major city.

So why was I not happy? Why did I look for more? Why did I walk out one day and never look back?

Because I was seeking a freedom driven business. A business that was an AD-VEnture…

The thing is, many people just don’t BELIEVE that it’s possible to create a business like that. My mission is to dispel that belief and help creative entrepreneurs break free of beliefs around business that might be holding them back from finding and following their true creative path.


Learn to commit and stay calm while you’re making big decisions

Creating anything takes time, whether it’s a healthy, strong body, a profitable business, or a happy home – doing something once is not going to get you there! Learning to commit is an essential skill for anyone. I know it’s challenging but there are 2 things I know to be true:

1. You have to commit to a course of action you feel confident and happy with
2. You have to re-commit regularly – it’s the second bit we struggle with I think!

Constantly questioning your decisions leads to uncertainty, confusion, and doubts, which is not only unproductive but very unsettling and disturbing! Being able to commit, even for a short period of time, allows us to focus on the task at hand – even if it’s something we might rather not be doing.

I think many people these days have a tendency to avoid commitment. Don’t want a ‘lock-in contract’ at the gym, want to be able to change their phone regularly and not have a large payout! It’s the nature of life, changeable and fluid, which is good – but can be a little ungrounding. But without some kind of commitment, there’s very little chance of actually achieving an outcome! It takes time to create something, whether it’s a strong body or a healthy business, regular, consistent activity is required.

So what do you do if you’re on a path, or in a commitment that you’re not sure about any more? Making a change can take a while to work out and while you’re in the middle of deciding what to do, don’t succumb to fear, doubts and worry.

Here’s my suggestions:

  • Put the question out there. Define what it is you need to make a decision on. Don’t brush it under the carpet and hope it will go away. Write it down. There’s usually 3 choices you have – accept it, change it or leave. If you can’t decide straight away, make a list of the things you need to keep doing in the mean time.
  • Put a timeframe on making a decision. Decide when you will decide by!
  • Make a small decision that you can stick with for a day, a week or whatever you know you can follow through with. It might be a decision on what you must do to keep going. Maybe minimise some of the more long-term activities and focus on the essential ones for a while.
  • Make an appointment with yourself to re-assess it in a short-term time – maybe a couple of days, or a week or two. Whatever timeframe you can completely commit to knowing that you’re not going to be worrying for that time.
  • Get on with your day, your week and focus on what needs to be done with complete faith that you’re on the right path, even if it’s only a short timeframe!
  • It will help you settle, clear your mind and allow you to come up with a more long-lasting decision that you can stick with for a longer period of time.

Photo by Luke Porter on Unsplash