Release the stress – allow a path to open up in front of you

The one thing that causes us more pain and frustration than anything, I believe, is the desire to make things happen. Our obsessions as humans, with goals, deadlines, outcomes, results causes dissatisfaction and stress. Even those words themselves make me feel a bit stressed!

I know myself, that whenever stress comes along and I get to the root of the problem, it’s pretty much always because I’ve lost the enjoyment in the moment, because I’m looking too far down the path towards an outcome or an end result.  You’d think by now that we’d have realised that the beauty and the real essence of life is in the here and now. But we’re still obsessed with trying to control things!

But then how do you achieve anything without goals? How does anything get done without a deadline? If we don’t know where we’re going, how are we going to get there? And how do we know if we’ve done it right? Been successful?

These questions are based on an old paradigm, one that needs a severe overhaul.

I know I’d be happy and content a lot more if I could learn to live in flow. And that is my desire – to eliminate stress. To let go of the need to know. To release the fear around achieving and outcome. To stop worrying about whether ‘it will work’ or ‘if it’s right’ or ‘if it’s the best way’ and just allow the next steps to unfold with faith and trust that my inner knowing is guiding me.

How do you do that? Cultivate self-awareness – which leads to a higher level of consciousness. That simply means being quiet and awake enough to hear and know – to see the signs and hear the guidance that comes from within and putting ourselves in the best possible mind space to make the next best decision!

Think about a time when you were quietly confident about your chosen path. Maybe it was one that others doubted or questioned, but you just knew that you were on the right path and you were going down it regardless. That’s the kind of quiet confidence you get when you know yourself enough to make your decisions with confidence and faith that you’ll meet the people you need when you step out on the path and that you’ll work out what you need to do when you need to.

Maybe it sounds a little intangible – verging on woo woo and quite possibly irresponsible, but let’s think about this for a minute.

We want to let go of worry. When did worrying about anything ever improve a situation? Worrying simply takes you out of flow and inhibits your ability to make good decisions in the moment.

How do we know if something is ‘right’. How can anything be right or wrong? What is right for one person might be totally wrong for a another.

How is it possible to control an outcome? Life by nature is changeable and to think we can control it would be foolish.

If we are living in our highest state of consciousness, we have the power to change what’s in front of us minute by minute just by making a decision that aligns with our truest self.

The path opens up in front of you if you have self awareness and are conscious. The Big Vision Baby Steps journey is a continuous exploration of self-awareness towards living at a higher consciousness. Each step in the book gives you a bit more self-awareness and allows you to see things just a little clearer and make better, clearer decisions.

To Hear and Know leads to being able to enjoy the Here and Now

My feeling better plan – how to stop worrying about what if and enjoy what is

When you think you’ve heard all the quotes you can, another one comes along just at the right time. “If you’re worrying about what if’s, you’re probably missing out on the what is”

I heard this on a movie last night. It’s so true for many of us. And I think it’s where we might be at right now. It’s easy to get caught up in the future, worrying about ‘what if’. Or maybe stressing about what isn’t. The thing to remember is to bring it back to the here and now. Again. And again. And again. What is here and now. What is real. What is good. What is bringing you joy and contentment.

To appreciate what is, and stop worrying about what might be, we need to stop and listen for a moment.

Here’s how I do it in four (sometimes not so) simple steps.

  1. Remove the frustration. Usually there’s some level of frustration around how I’m feeling. Maybe I’m doing something you don’t want to be doing, or resisting doing something I know I need to do. Or perhaps just experiencing a feeling of discomfort that I can’t really put my finger on. First I know I need to remove the frustration by letting go, even if just for a moment.
  2. Release the fear. Then I can begin to release any fear that might be there. Usually it’s because I’m thinking too far ahead and I need to pull myself back into the moment.
  3. Follow your heart. By focusing on the hear and now, I can begin to feel my way forward. I can usually hear thoughts that are guiding me towards a simple next step. One that brings me simple joy. Even if it’s a really small one, it’s one that gives me a feeling of calm and contentment that I follow.
  4. Find your freedom path. Then I’m usually back on some kind of calm and happy track that keeps me moving forward.

This process usually involves self-care, being nice to yourself and treating yourself with kindness rather than criticising yourself for not having your shit together! Feeling your way through and not feeding your negative or fearful thoughts.

Here’s a few things I do as I go through this process.

  1. Walk. A ten minute walk will clear the mind and refresh your thinking. Perfect way to let go and listen.
  2. Qi gong. Grounding exercise to still the mind and body. I like to introduce a few simple mantras to set my intentions.
  3. Write. The best way to let go of frustrating thoughts, un-finished ideas and pent-up fears. No-one has to see them except for you!
  4. Have a cup of tea. My all time favourite. How can you not feel better?
  5. Do some yoga. Working through the nooks and crannies of the body has a way of clearing the same in the mind.
  6. Get up and move. Just do something! The worst thing you can do is sit and ponder, it will lead to a downward spiral that’s hard to get out of.

These work – every time. How long and how many you need to do varies, but if you keep them in your daily routine, make time and space for them regularly, you will find you are more centred, calmer and have more clarity to take your next steps calmly and happily.